5.22.2012

Working in an office for eight hours every day gives me something to do but it makes me really appreciate that one lunch hour when I can stand there - eyes closed, warmed by the sun, deeply breathing in the breeze.

05.01.2012

This overwhelming feeling made sleep difficult last night. As much I physically worked to tire out my body, I don’t think anything short of drugs or alcohol could had enough force to put my wandering mind to rest. I’d desperately love to shake this off.

What if Kidz Pop did a version to “Niggas in Paris?”

dirtyluxury:

What’s Oodle, my Noodle? What’s Toaster, my Strudel? What’s drawing, my doodle? What’s that puppy, a poodle?

HAHAHA. Too funny not to reblog. Aren’t they on like Kidz Bop 50 or some shit?

(Source: dirtyluxury, via yookah)

12.9.11

Well, so much for trying to normalize my sleeping schedule. I knocked out at 5 AM downstairs to the bros LoLing up until 11 AM when I crawled into the comfort of my bed. This morning was just one of those mornings where I didn’t want to get up or get out. Today, I really just soaked in and appreciated the simple comforts in life - but then reality struck.

I got up for work to another mundane shift. It was slow yet bearable but my mind was consumed by thoughts of delicious and greasy food. Since late October, I’ve been trying to bring my body fat percentage down but it’s been difficult since I LOVE FOOD - and not just any food. I appreciate exotic flavors and high scale cuisine but nothing beats the comforts of tasty and cheap food. It’s been especially difficult turning cravings down this week since our Brotherhood Trip was this weekend and we’d undoubtedly be consuming hella food and hella beer. I did a pretty good job of holding out but then, at the end of my shift, there was a coupon I couldn’t pass up.

I left work, went to the Spectrum to pick up some thick ass socks since I lost all of mine last trip and then picked up my little bro from campus. He has one last final at 8AM, which sucks, but I’m sure he’ll do well. Without hesitation, my fatass decided to go big and order TWO LARGE DOMINO’S PIZZAS, which came out to only $20. What a fucking steal. I was beyond excited to bite into the pizza when I picked it up. When you’re used to eating nonfat yogurt, grilled chicken breast, Cheerios and eggs on a daily basis, food like this is fucking Heaven. Below is a fairly close depiction of me during dinner.

Since no fucks were given today, I loaded shit up with three additional Holiday Pies, to Rags’ disgust, but I’m saving the two for tomorrow. I ate pizza until I was ridiculously full, washed it down with one beer which made me surprisingly buzzed and then proceeded to knock the fuck out. I woke up at 11PM, felt hella guilty and went to 24 around 2 AM ‘til now to work off as much of what I just put on. Knocking out soon and then waking up early; got a lot of shit to handle tomorrow.

Random work musings

I’m hungry; terribly hungry at the moment. I am SO ready to get the hell out of this office and devour the fattiest, sweetest, greasiest thing that I can find in my kitchen. My mind is currently occupied by two thoughts: 1) The clock on the bottom right hand corner of the computer screen counting down until 4PM. 2) Pathetically looking at Yelp for pictures to mentally satisfy my cravings at the moment.

Fuck, I want this.

Or this..

and..

and I’m pretty sure that, right now, I could eat this whole thing in one sitting.

:(

12.8.11

I missed posting yesterday because I was too exhausted. As for today, I had a ridiculous dream. It pretty much involved my actual little brother, a swamp zombie amusement park and a dope ass Krispy Kreme with Kreayshawn as the cashier. It was weird as fuck and in retrospect, I can’t believe that I didn’t realize I was dreaming. Even Bender and Varquez made an appearance buying doughtnuts at the shop. o_O I got up early to tutor and then went straight to work. It was a relatively uneventful day but towards the end of my shift, I got SUPER PISSED. I really wanted to choke a bitch and although I’m over it now, this only solidifies my need to find a real and more fulfilling job than the one that I have. The duties don’t demand to much but I get sick and tired of this Asian parent authoritative mentality in the workplace. I made an effort to keep away from that at home, why would I want to stick around in a similar environment? I swear, it angers me when, although I have a valid point, I have to shut up, learn my place on the totem pole and just take it.

I got the hell out of there as soon as I could and prepared myself for a lengthy tutoring lesson with my tutee. I hope I’ve prepared her enough for her test tomorrow and the homemade Korean food from her mom is a always a plus. Dissolved my pent up anger at the gym today and now I’m hungry. Terribly hungry. I’ve spent three days craving a four Holiday Pies from McDonald’s. I usually hate sweets, like brownies, cakes/cupcakes and overly frosted cookies, but two things I won’t turn down EVER are pie and doughnuts. I’m trying hard to fight temptation but for those who haven’t tried it, imagine a frosted sugar cookie transformed into flaky pie crust filled with a buttery egg custard on the inside. Doesn’t that sound bomb? Fuckkk, only two mores days until cheat day. :(

12.6.11

I think Mondays are terrible but this one was exhausting. Lately, I’ve been sleeping at 6 AM due to insomnia or excessive caffeine due to tea drinking late at night. I was gonna skip on today’s entry but I decided a shorter one was better than nothing.

I woke up today dreading 9 AM. I mean, it already sucked that I couldn’t sleep til 6AM but I really dreaded that time. Why? Because I had to make an important phone call at that time. I find myself extremely nervous when I talk to my Dad. It’s not that I hate him or am uncomfortable with him. I just feel that whenever we talk there’s a hardened facade of being direct and straight to business. In the background, I hear hints of “I miss seeing you at home.” and “It’s been a long time, I’ve wondered what you’ve been up to lately.” The thought of it really kills me on the inside. I think he’s too hardened of a military man to be explicit with me about it but I’m not oblivious. I think my biggest fear when talking to him is about my own future. I’ve come to terms that the reason why I don’t contact home is because I’m ashamed of myself. Nonetheless, I was relieved the phone call was brief and ended without screaming, anger or disappointment.

I was still pretty irritable from being deprived of sleep and it didn’t help that Bender and most of Bordeaux was up at this ungodly hour due to Finals Week. Then Bender does his usual routine of never waking up to his alarm (which wakes me up in the process) and then proceeding to blast “Niggas in Paris” while showering. Though grumpy, watching them made me reminisce about school and how I sadly wish I was back in it learning something new and something that I wanted actually learn about for a change.

I was late for work since I overslept from the nap I took when everyone bounced to campus in the morning. Work was as dull as always. It didn’t really help that my boss had us ship everything hella last minute. It pretty forced me to stay late an extra hour but I don’t mind the pay. Straight after, I went to go tutor Physics for two hours. I swear my “tutee’s” (I guess that what she’d be) mom makes the bombest Korean food. Ended this day at 24 with Sithu but I felt really unmotivated to work out today. I’m still glad I got to break in my new jump rope though. It’s heavier than I expected but hopefully it gives me the results I need. We’ll see how long this one lasts. Ending the night by watching a downloaded copy of Margarito VS Cotto II.